God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen
by JourneyBeforeDestination
Summary: Alternate ending to Bullet Pen. Murdoc decides to pay Mac a visit instead of Cage.


**A/N: I've had this in my head for months, and I just finished it last night, so yay! I would like to thank my lovely beta and encourager, who is also a fic writer, known on tumblr as macspaperclips and on AO3 as** **bowties_Scarves_and_Plaid. Also, to katikat, for writing so many amazing fics!**

 **I really hope you enjoy this, and if you do please review and/or favorite!**

* * *

 _"God rest ye merry, gentlemen_

 _Let nothing you dismay._

 _Remember Christ, our Savior,_

 _Was born on Christmas day_

 _To save us all from Satan's power_

 _When we were gone astray._

 _O tidings of comfort and joy"_

* * *

It was more than a little disconcerting to be walking through the same door the cops had taken him through hours ago. He could still remember how horrified he'd been at the possibility he'd killed an innocent, even by accident. He only felt a little better that the cartel had murdered him instead, and that of course only made him feel worse. _Feel later_. His friends had Christmas to celebrate and he'd ruined it enough already with his arrest, he wasn't about to utterly kill the mood by dumping his burdens on them. He'd deal with them later, after all Christmas only came once a year. Emotions unfortunately stuck around.

"The pastrami'll be ready in no time!" Bozer rushed to the kitchen, desperate to do his part in trying to recapture the spirit of their earlier party. "I'll need some help from my lovely assistant though!" Rolling her eyes while a smile tugged at her lips, Riley headed for the kitchen.

"I'll grab us some beers and we can sit out on the deck." Mac grinned, if anyone could lift his mood it was Jack. "Matty'll be inside for a bit so it'll just be the two of us." Jack was subtly offering him the choice to either discuss what had happened or to ignore it, he'd known Mac for too long to try to push him before he was ready.

"Yeah, sure, just let me change first." His clothes smelled like a mixture of gunpowder and dirty floors due to his earlier run-in with the cartel hitman in the precinct basement. While the smell was subtle it was still there and a fresh change of clothes were another way for Mac to distance himself from the day's events.

"Don't take too long or your beer'll get warm." Jack warned, patting him on the shoulder, then he turned and walked towards the kitchen while Mac went to his bedroom. He'd barely shut the door when a gloved hand covered his mouth and a needle jabbed his neck. Mac struggled as best he could as the room spun and his strength evaporated from him.

"Relax, it's just little old me." _Murdoc_. Mac's blood ran cold. He was helpless and his friends were on the other side of that door with their guards down, perfect targets. He weakly tried and failed to pull Murdoc's hand off his mouth. _I have to warn them..._ "I must say your little exploding dart impressed me." _What?_ "Who do you think sent him after you? All I had to do was inform him of El Noche's reward."

Mac fought through the mental fog, desperate to focus and find a way to somehow alert his friends. _Gotta be something..._ "You put me in such a good mood with that stunt I decided to pay you a visit, and of course I come bearing gifts." Murdoc's excited whisper only made Mac more terrified of his "gift". "Do you prefer 'Happy Holidays' or 'Merry Christmas'?"

A sharp pain pierced his stomach, then a second and a final third one. Mac's cries of pain were muffled by the glove, and Murdoc gently and silently guided him to the floor, where the light from the crack under the door reflected off the bloody blade of his knife. Mac's hands instinctively moved toward the wounds but they were too weak to do anything except lie there. "I should kill you and your friends right now, but that'd be no fun. Don't worry, MacGyver, this isn't over, I enjoy our little game far too much for that." He could feel Murdoc's breath on his ear and he could blurrily make out the profile of his face. Mercifully, the pain began to lessen as the world drifted farther and farther away. "Until next time."

Then the world was gone.

* * *

"Mac?" Jack called out as he knocked on the door. Even taking his sweet time -which would be very un-Maclike- Mac should've been out by now. _Maybe he's more messed up than I thought_. Jack could understand how being arrested, accused of murder, and nearly murdered could kill one's Christmas spirit. _We should've waited till tomorrow to celebrate_. What kind of idiot had Jack been to think Mac would want to party after all that? _I thought it'd cheer him up_. "Look, dude, I know you're not alright, so we can cancel the party and...work it out. We don't mind."

Still no answer, not even a sound. And the lights were off. "I'm coming in, so..." Jack pushed the door open and the first thing he noticed was the blood. It pooled on the floor around Mac and soaked his shirt and pants. No. Jack ran to him and mercifully found a weak pulse. He wadded up Mac's shirt and did his best to stanch the blood, but there was so much... "Matty, I need an ambulance here now! Bozer bring me some clean towels!" Mac could not die. He just couldn't. "C'mon, man, it's Christmas." _Kind of_. "Pull off another miracle, please." If Mac could survive all the melees, shootouts, explosions, and other crazy situations they always seemed to find themselves in, then he could survive this.

Bozer arrived with the towels and said something Jack didn't care enough to listen to, keeping Mac alive was the only thing that mattered. _Stay with me, Mac,_ Jack pleaded silently as he noticed red soaking into the towels. "Sir, I'll take over." Gloved hands replaced his on the towels and Jack realized the paramedics must have arrived. Numbly, he stepped back so they could work on Mac. As much as he hated giving Mac over to strangers, they were Mac's best chance of survival. He didn't pay much attention to their medical mumbo jumbo, he only listened for words that could tell him whether Mac would be okay or not.

After what could have been minutes or hours they loaded Mac onto the gurney and wheeled him out to the ambulance. Now that he was in the light Jack could see just how pale Mac was. He looked like a corpse. The thought made Jack feel to sick to his stomach, after all he and Mac had survived in the Middle East, and countless foreign missions, and now there was a very real chance Mac could die on home soil. _Don't even think about i_ t. Somehow just thinking about it made it more likely to happen. Jack hurried over to his car, determined to follow the ambulance to the hospital. Jack had never willingly left Mac's side all the other times he'd been injured and that wasn't about to change now.

Jack floored the gas pedal and ran just as many red lights as the ambulance did.

* * *

Mac was in surgery for hours, long enough for Jack to run through every prayer he knew, every argument he'd ever had with Mac, and every method of torture he'd use on the bastard who did it. Matty, Bozer, and Riley had arrived soon after him but had wisely given him his space. Cage had taken longer since she swung by his place to bring him some non-bloody clothes which he'd changed into. He'd also decided that would be a good time to wash Mac's blood off his hands, but even though it was long gone he could still see it.

"Jack?" Matty asked gently. Jack barely restrained himself from snapping at her, she was using her soft voice and Jack simply could not have that kind of conversation right then. His emotions were too erratic, he'd either launch into a tirade of angry promises of what he'd do to the attacker or he'd break down crying. "We know who did it." The burning desire for vengeance harnessed his other emotions like nothing else could and Jack impatiently waited for Matty to give him the name. "Murdoc."

Now it seemed so obvious, it was exactly the sort of thing that creepy psycho would do. The considerable hatred Jack had held for him before was nothing compared to what he felt now, he would violate the Geneva convention a million different ways on him and it would be absolutely worth it. _That bastard is going to pay_. More importantly, he'd never be able to hurt Mac again. "He left the knife in a present box in the yard with a note that said _'Merry Christmas -M'_ on it." Both a taunt and a promise of a future encounter, though Jack would make sure it was their last. "We're searching for him now."

Jack doubted they would find him, Murdoc was too clever and as time went on, the heat to find him would die down. Jack, however, would hunt him until one or both of them was dead. His fantasies of revenge were rudely interrupted by the doctor's voice. "Family of Angus MacGyver?" He jumped to his feet, desperate and simultaneously terrified for news. _Please let him be okay_. He could still remember when Mac'd simply been the dumbass know-it-all EOD tech with the silly hamburger name, now he was so much more than that. He was family, and the mere thought of losing him was unbearable. "I'm happy to tell you the surgery was a success." Jack let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. _Mac'll be okay_. "However, he is very weak and he lost a lot of blood. Luckily no organs were hit."

Jack blinked in surprise. Multiple stab wounds to the stomach and nothing major hit? Either Murdoc had suddenly become the most incompetent hitman in existence or he hadn't wanted Mac dead. _That son of a bitch, I'm gonna kill him._ Murdoc had attacked Mac just as another one of his sadistic games. His relief quickly crushed his anger, however, because Mac would be alright. That was the most important thing. "Can I see him?"

The doctor bit her lip, then sighed. "He won't wake up till sometime tomorrow, but as long as you don't disturb him or the nurses, you're welcome to stay as long as you like. Only one visitor at a time, though, until I say otherwise. Room 314." Jack muttered a quick thank you and walked as fast as he could without running until he reached Room 314.

* * *

Mac blinked his eyes open to a harsh white bright light. _Ugh_. He squinted in reaction and he tried to raise a hand to cover his eyes. That was when he felt the IV. _Murdoc_. He remembered Murdoc had been there, and then pain and blackness... _an IV and a light_. He panicked, barely able to breathe. _No, not again_. "Easy, buddy." Jack's voice broke through the fear and panic and Mac calmed down. Not only was Jack there, but he sounded too calm for them to be in danger. "We're in the hospital." _Hospital. Of course_. Mac relaxed back into the pillows he hadn't noticed were there before. "Do you remember anything?"

"Murdoc," He croaked out, his body was too weak to be very cooperative. He suspected the ache in his stomach had something to do with it. He remembered the knife and the pain, and Murdoc's breath on his ear...Mac shivered. If he closed his eyes he could still feel Murdoc's presence. _Jack's here, Murdoc isn't_. "He stabbed me."

Jack stared down at his hands, his heart twisting at how Mac shivered. _I should have protected him_. "We'll find him, Mac. I swear it." Hadn't Jack made a similar promise the first time they went up against Murdoc? And the second time? _We don't find Murdoc, he finds us_. He had attacked them at the Phoenix, albeit by proxy, and now Mac's own home twice. No place was safe. "I'm sorry, Mac."

Mac wanted to shake his head and explain that it was not Jack or anyone else's fault but his, and that Jack needed to stop blaming himself for things he couldn't control, but he lacked the strength. "Not your fault." He repeated, a little firmer this time. He was so tired and he didn't want to be, he needed to be up helping his friends locate Murdoc.

Jack breathed in deeply, the way he did right before he opened up. "When I came in there, and saw you on the ground...I was terrified, either that I had lost you or that I was going to. Protecting you is more than just a job to me, you know that. You nearly died on my watch, Mac." Mac's death would destroy Jack, they both knew that. It might not kill him, not as long as he had Riley, but it would break him.

"Not gonna die," Mac whispered. Even if he had, the blame would have been his. _He_ had been caught off-guard by Murdoc, _he_ had been the one too weak to fight back. "You saved me." _As always_ he added silently. He closed his eyes for a few seconds, then opened them when he felt himself falling asleep. He'd been unconscious for who knew how long -actually Jack would certainly know- and he didn't want to spend any more time down.

Jack, however, disagreed as a genuine smile lit up his face. "I saw that, sleepyhead. You need to rest." Jack had a streak of overbearing mother hen in him, and while usually Mac would protest, his head was already slumping back onto the pillow.

* * *

Mac's strength gradually improved over a few days and though the others had to return to work, Jack's job stationed him exactly where he wanted to be. He'd brought plenty of paperclips and a few of Mac's favorite books so he wouldn't lose his mind while he was awake, though Mac had spent most of the time sleeping. Not that Jack minded, the most important thing to him was that Mac recovered. So far his physical recovery was on track, however his emotional recovery, on the other hand...

"You wanna talk about anything?" Jack probed gently, with Mac one had to ease these things out. If he asked about it directly, Mac would make up an excuse or brush it off somehow, and if Jack tried to drag it out of him Mac would clam up even more. Mac would rather confront a nuclear bomb than his emotions, and while he could compartmentalize with the best of them, emotions always had to be dealt with _eventually_. Jack's job was to be there when _eventually_ arrived.

Mac rolled his eyes. "I know what you're doing," Unfortunately Mac knew Jack just as well as Jack knew Mac. "I'm fine, Jack. I've nearly died so many times on the job, this is nothing." Jack would've believed him if there wasn't a glaring hole in his comparison. One expected to be attacked out in the field, it was part of the job, one did not expect to be attacked and nearly killed in their own home.

The fact Mac was putting so much effort into trying to cover it up made Jack realize it must have disturbed Mac more than even he suspected. "This wasn't a rando in the field, Mac, this was Murdoc in your house." Jack didn't add 'again'. "I saw how panicked you were when you first woke up, Mac. I'm worried about you." Jack added more softly, as a veteran he understood the true psychological toll of trauma better than most. He also knew how damaging it could be to suffer alone and he didn't want Mac to go through that. "Please, man, just talk to me."

Mac closed his eyes and for a moment Jack thought he was just going to deny it again until Mac sighed and opened his eyes back up. "What do you want to hear, Jack? That I still feel like Murdoc's here, even when I know he isn't? Or that I'm afraid to go back to my own bedroom? I can handle that, Jack, I can, it's just..." Mac trailed off and stared at the wall. "He doesn't want me dead yet. He wants me to suffer, even when he isn't there, especially where I felt safe." Felt. Past tense. "The doctor told me how he didn't hit any organs. An expert hitman stabs me three times and doesn't hit anything vital? That's no accident." Murdoc had done it because he knew how profound a violation it would be for Mac.

Jack had come to that conclusion two days earlier and he'd been desperately praying Mac wouldn't. Unfortunately, the kid was too smart for his own good. As usual. "I won't let him hurt you again." Jack couldn't undo the damage Murdoc had done, and he would never forgive himself for allowing it to happen in the first place, but he would stop Murdoc from tormenting Mac further. Mac just stared at the paperclip he was twisting, and Jack knew Mac didn't want to discuss it further. "Y'know even after they let you out of here, you can't stay home alone. And since Bozer has to work in the lab..."

Mac smiled, a tiny but genuine grin that made Jack smile too, he hadn't realized how much he'd missed it. "You just want an excuse to make me sit through a movie marathon." They both knew that wasn't the real reason but neither would acknowledge it. They'd suffered enough to know that when life knocked you down, you couldn't stay down forever, you needed to find someone to help you get back on your feet.

And that was what family was for.

* * *

 _"All you within this place_

 _And with true brotherhood and love,_

 _Each other now embrace;_

 _This holy tide of Christmas_

 _All other doth deface"_


End file.
